Yoitsuki no Shizuku ~Bakumatsu Koi Tsudzuri~ Vol 4 Yoshida Shoin

Title	宵月ノ雫～幕末恋綴り～四ノ章吉田松陰
Romaji	Yoitsuki no Shizuku Bakumatsu Koi Tsudzuri 4 nosho Yoshida Shoin
Eng.	Drops of Moonlight Bakumatsu Love Story Vol 4 Yoshida Shoin
CV	森川智之 Morikawa Toshiyuki

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Tracks

A Compassionate Heart

[00:01]
Spring of Kaei 3 [1]. I was teaching military science at our clan school, the Meirinkan. I specialized in the Yamaga-style strategy. Though I had been adopted into the Yoshida family, I was staying with the Sugi family, where I was born and raised.

As Mencius said, “All men have a mind which cannot bear to see the sufferings of others. The ancient kings had this commiserating mind, …” [2]

Oh, it’s alright, please come in. What’s is it?

Lunch? Ahh, is it that time already? I tend to lose track of everything else when I’m reading—It’s a bad habit of mine. I guess I got a bit too absorbed in my books.

You don’t need to be so polite. It’s been three months already since you arrived here.

[01:15]
You always seem reserved because you think you feel indebted to us, right?

I’m not here to scold you. Please, tell me honestly.

I see, so that’s what’s been troubling you. But neither my family nor I consider what we did to be anything as grand as “saving” you.

For example, imagine a small child right in front of you, wobbly on his feet and about to fall into a deep well. What would you do? [3]

Yes, of course you’d try to save that child. But at that moment, would you think about getting a reward from the parents? Or hope for praise from your friends?

[02:22]
Exactly, you wouldn’t think about any of that. You’d reach out to help the child simply because you care. Mencius, whose work I was just reading, says that all of us are born with this natural compassion that moves us to help.

So you see, my family and I did nothing special. We simply followed our hearts.

Besides, you’re already like family here, and to me, you’re like a younger sister. Think of me as your affectionate older brother patting your head, there’s no need for you to hold back.

From the day you arrived as a little girl, holding your father’s hand, all we’ve wanted is for you to be happy.

Yes, that smile suits you perfectly. There’s no rush—take your time and make yourself at home.

[1] All dates in this CD follow the Japanese lunar calendar.
[2] 人皆有不忍人之心。先王有不忍人之心（，斯有不忍人之政矣。）from Mencius, Chapter 3 Gongsun Chou I.
“All men have a mind which cannot bear to see the sufferings of others. The ancient kings had this commiserating mind (, and they, as a matter of course, had likewise a commiserating government.)” translated by James Legge.
[3] This example is also from Mencius, Gongsun Chou I.

Firefly’s Glow

[00:09]
Good morning.

Yes, I’ll be out for a while on some business. I have a military science lecture at Meirinkan this afternoon, so I probably won’t be back until evening.

Working in the fields again today? Father’s been so pleased with all your help here, saying you’ve been a real blessing. And Mother can’t stop praising your skills in the kitchen.

You’ve really become a part of this family. It brings me joy to see you living happily and smiling every day.

Well then, I’m off.

(Evening)

[01:16]
I finished much earlier than planned. I’m glad that the lecture went smoothly, but honestly, shouldn’t we look beyond the textbook and pay more attention to what’s happening across the sea?

I’ve heard that parts of Qing have already fallen under British control. This certainly isn’t something irrelevant to us…

Hm? Oh, that’s… someone I know.

What are you sons of the Ogumi [1] doing here? Skipping your lectures at Meirinkan to harass a girl?

[02:15]
If I’m not mistaken, it seems you were being quite rude to this young lady just now. She’s under our care. If you have anything to say, you may come to me directly.

But before that, as much as it pains me, I may have to inform your fathers that their honored sons have given up on studies to engage in such unseemly behavior.

Oh, does that concern you? Then, apologize to her now and here, and I’ll let it slide this time. So, what will you do?

Good. Off you go, then. There won’t be a next time.

Hmph… good grief. It’s all right now. Calling you “once a daughter of the Ogumi”… what a heartless thing to say. It’s disheartening to think these individuals, lacking basic compassion, will one day carry the future of this clan.

I gave them a bit of a scare, but if this happens again, please don’t hesitate to tell me.

[03:51]
Let’s go home. The sun’s going down.

(At night)

[04:06]
After dinner, I noticed you weren’t around. So, this is where you were. I had a feeling I’d find you here. Were you crying?

It’s all right. If you feel like crying, then let it all out. Come here.

Don’t worry. No one will see your tears while I hold you like this.

Was it because of what they said earlier? Then what exactly is troubling you? You can’t forgive yourself?

Ah, I see—you felt bitter about what your father did, and now you regret having those feelings? You’re very honest.

[05:16]
Two years ago, your father revealed his superior had been embezzling public funds. As a result, he lost his position in the Ogumi, and you, his daughter, were also put in a difficult position.

After your father and mother passed away, those who didn’t know the truth treated you coldly, as the daughter of a disgraceful man who’d stepped out of line and lost everything.

But deep down, you knew, didn’t you? While everyone else in the clan turned a blind eye, your father did the right thing. That’s why you’re crying now.

[06:10]
There’s nothing wrong with that at all. You have nothing to be ashamed of. Your father upheld his loyalty and justice. Hold your head high and be proud of him. Even if the world doesn’t know the truth, those who matter will.

It looks like you’ve stopped crying. But you still look troubled. Is something else bothering you?

No, your father wouldn’t blame you. He’s just worried about you, that’s all.

[07:11]
Look around. Without us noticing, so many fireflies appeared. Since ancient times, it’s been said that a firefly’s glow carries the souls of the departed. Though fireflies are common in this area, they’ve arrived early this year. Perhaps your parents, who now rest in the afterlife, are thinking about their beloved daughter.

Show them a smile. I’m sure it’ll make them happy.

Hehehe, that’s a good girl.

Oh, I’m sorry. Did I hold you too tightly? My little sister Fumi [2] was quite the crybaby, and I used to hold her just like this until her tears dried up.

But… It seems you’re fine now. Hm? Your face is red. Was it hard to breathe?

[08:32]
Really? You might have gotten cold from staying by the water too long.

Here, wear my haori. I don’t want you to catch a cold.

Now, it’s time to head back. Everyone must be worried. Let’s go.

Hm? What is it?

Ah, so Father told you. Yes, I’m leaving the clan soon. I’ve received permission to study in Kyushu. While I’ll be traveling to various places to expand my knowledge, my main focus is studying the latest Western military science in Nagasaki.

[09:49]
These past few years, Western powers have been sailing their ships into our waters. They could arrive en masse at any moment—perhaps even tomorrow. If that happens, and we know nothing about these foreigners, we won’t stand a chance against their threat.

As a scholar of military strategy, I have a duty to protect this country. It’s also my conviction.

When will I return to Hagi? Well, it’ll be at least six months.

Yes, I’ll miss you too. Surprised? Of course I’ll feel lonely leaving my dear little sister behind.

So, shall I make a wish upon the bright stars tonight? While I’m away, I wish for you to stay healthy and free from worry everyday.

Oh? Do you have a wish, too?

Your wish will surely bring me back safely. Thank you.

(Offscreen)

[11:41]
During my time in Kyushu, I met Miyabe Teizo, who would become a lifelong friend. Our conversations only deepened my concern about how vulnerable our country is.

I don’t have the luxury of taking my time to travel and expand my knowledge. I must see for myself—the defenses of Edo, our country’s heart, and the coastal fortifications of Tohoku—as soon as possible.

Having made this decision, I cut my studies in Kyushu short and returned to Hagi by the end of that same year.

However, it wasn’t until the following year that my wish to go to Edo was finally realized.

[1] 御組 (Ogumi): A general title given to the officials of the Edo shogunate.
[2] 杉文 (Sugi Fumi): Yoshida Shoin’s youngest sister.

Black Ships

[00:01]
In March of Kaei 4 (1851), I traveled to Edo as a retainer in Lord Mori’s sankin-kotai [1]. But in May of the following year, I was sent back to Hagi and placed under house arrest at the Sugi household. This was because, at the end of last year, I left Edo for Tohoku without waiting for my travel papers from the clan, and was charged with desertion. After about seven months of confinement, they finally delivered a formal decision on my punishment.

Oh, you’re still up? There’s nothing admirable about staying up late. Although, I suppose I’m not in a position to lecture anyone right now. Well, come in.

(Enter the room)

It’s been a while since we’ve had a conversation like this.

I guess you want to know about the punishment I received today.

[01:26]
I’ve been dismissed as a retainer. In other words, I’ve been stripped of my rank and become a ronin, just as expected.

Heh, surprised I’m not more upset? When I decided to leave Edo for Tohoku, I was more concerned with time than my status as a samurai. Do you remember when I mentioned how Western powers have been sailing their ships in Japanese waters?

I once had a glimpse of their overwhelming military power in Nagasaki. That was why my friend Miyabe Teizou and I were shocked to see the poor condition of coastal defenses in Edo. It was easy to imagine that Tohoku would only be more vulnerable. If we were attacked in such a state, this country would fall under foreign control in no time.

[02:44]
We had to act quickly to prevent this. Though I had permission to go to Tohoku, I waited over five months but still hadn’t received my travel papers. I couldn’t afford to wait any longer. That’s when I chose the path of desertion.

Heh, don’t look at me like that. I have no regrets. So go ahead, laugh at your hopeless older brother. Or, perhaps you’d prefer to puff up your lovely cheeks and call me a fool?

You’re so kind. Well then, in that case, shall I share one more truth to you? Please listen closely.

Being a ronin just suits me better—I can move more freely without any official rank. Let’s keep that between us—especially don’t tell Uncle. Even at my age, I still dread the thought of his thunderous scolds.

Yes, this will be our little secret.

(Offscreen)

[04:23]
At the dawn of Kaei 6 (1853), I received permission to spend 10 years studying throughout Japan, and so once again I left Hagi to travel around the country. In June of that same year, Commodore Perry’s American Black Ships appeared in Uraga. Even after I returned to Hagi at the end of October, I still couldn’t shake off the shock of seeing those massive, intimidating vessels.

(Scene switches)

Good morning. You’re up early today. For me? I just got caught up in my thoughts all night, and all of a sudden it was dawn. At this point there’s no use trying to sleep, so I thought about taking a walk in the woods behind the house. Would you like to join me?

Let’s go, then.

(Walking)

[05:38]
The morning mist is thick today. Watch your step, it might be hard to see the path ahead.

Oh, you’ve stepped in some mud. Are you all right? Don’t worry about it. I’m just glad you didn’t slip.

Hm… the roads around here seem pretty bad. Come, walk closer to me. All right, let’s keep going.

Oh, look how the leaves have turned. It feels much more like winter here than it did in Edo. In Tohoku, it’s probably starting to snow soon.

It’s already been two years since the black ships came. Their arrival was much sooner than expected.

[06:57]
Yes, those black ships will definitely return to our shores. When they do, the shogunate will probably have no choice but give in to Perry’s demands and open our country. With those formidable black ships at our doorstep, the shogunate can only bow their heads.

The state of our coastal defenses remains as poor as it was two years ago. Those who call for the expulsion of foreigners grow louder. Still, while I once thought the same, I now believe we must open the country and send people abroad to learn Western technology and military tactics. Do you know why?

[07:58]
It’s because we don’t have the strength to expel foreigners. That’s why we must build up enough strength to stand as equals with the Western nations. It may sound contradictory, but in order to meet them on equal footing, we must abandon old ways of thinking. At least until this country can truly stand on its own two feet.

I’m sorry. I’m the one who invited you for a walk but the only thing I did was bore you with all this heavy talk. Shall we continue on a bit further?

Huh? Oh… come to think of it, I’ve been holding your hand this entire time. I’m sorry—Old habits die hard. I used to do this with my younger sisters.

Are you upset? I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to treat you like a child. It’s just that your gentle warmth feels comforting, yet your hand is so tiny compared to mine. It’s strange…

Heh, don’t worry, I won’t do it again.

Ah… what is it? You… want to keep holding hands?

[09:57]
I see… Alright then, let’s keep holding hands like this.

Hm? What was that?

Me? I’ll be leaving Hagi soon to return to Edo. Even if the country open its borders, the shogunate still resists embracing Western technology and military tactics. I need to set that in motion, to prove how beneficial it is for this country to send people abroad and have them learn all they can.

Well, who knows how things will turn out? But my comrades and I want to do everything we can.

Whatever may come… I’ll remain true to my convictions.

[1] 参覲交代 (Sankin Kotai): A policy the Edo shogunate created to control the daimyo. It required the daimyo to alternate between living in their domain and the shogunate’s capital, Edo.

Teacher in Seclusion

[00:02]
In March of Ansei 1 (1854), I violated the national ban by attempting to secretly board one of the Black Ships anchored off Shimoda—trying to get to America.

I was caught as a criminal and imprisoned in Edo’s Denmacho jail. In October, I was sent back to Hagi and thrown into the Noyama Prison.

About a year later, in December of Ansei 2 (1855), I was released. As before, I was placed under house arrest in a secluded quarter of the Sugi household.

(Sugi household)

[00:44]
Come in. So the books I requested have arrived. Thank you. Oh, have you been doing some washing?

Your fingertips are quite red—that must be painful. Please warm them by the brazier for a bit; it should help.

Since my return from Noyama Prison, you’ve been taking care of me every day, without a single complaint. There’s something I’ve been wanting to ask you. When I left Hagi at the end of last year, you sensed that I was planning something, right?

[02:04]
So you did notice. In that case, I must thank you. Back then, I had made up my mind to stow away on a Black Ship. I wanted to be the first to demonstrate the value of studying abroad.

My plan eventually failed midway due to my own oversight. Even so, I was able to stay true to my convictions because you saw me off silently. You might find it odd to be thanked for this, but please allow me to say it anyway—thank you.

Huh? You have a favor to ask me? What is it? Go on, tell me.

[03:15]
You want me to teach you Mencius? My father and uncle said something similar. It’s true that during my time in Noyama Prison, I got permission from the warden to teach the other inmates Mencius. But are you only asking this out of concern—thinking I might be bored being confined to this room?

It’s not that? Then why do you want to learn?

You want to understand my way of thinking? And you believe studying Mencius will help you do that?

I can see such strong determination in your eyes. It’s like I’m seeing a whole new side of you.

[04:26]
Alright then. I won’t turn down someone eager to learn. But there’s something you should know—I won’t simply be your teacher. When I teach you, I’ll also be learning from you. Let’s learn from each other.

Heh, that’s quite an enthusiastic response.

(Offscreen)

[04:56]
And so, a private Mencius lecture for my family got started in this secluded room of the Sugi household.

Before long, word spread and people began joining us from the outside. My teaching grew beyond just Mencius to include military strategy, history, and sometimes poetry and composition.

Soon, this small classroom became known by the same name my uncle, Tamaki Bunnoshin, had once used for his school: Shoka Sonjuku.

Buoys

[00:01]
As the number of students increased, Shoka Sonjuku, once just a cramped tatami room, was relocated to a converted shed on the Sugi estate. By the spring of Ansei 5 (1858), I also left my secluded quarters to live in this new school building.

(Shoka Sonjuku)

[00:26]
Hm? Oh, it’s you. Don’t worry, it’s fine. The last two students just left a few moments ago.

So you’ve noticed those two as well, right? The tall one is Kusaka, and the one with a rather flashy style is Takasugi. They’re truly outstanding among all my students.

Those two are quite competitive and always try to outdo one another. If they keep pushing each other, I believe they could make their mark on this country’s history one day.

That’s how excited I am to see them grow. I’m thinking of having my friend Katsura help arrange for those two to study in Edo soon. Oh? Why are you smiling?

Yes, I can’t help enjoying myself. I may be confined to the Sugi household, but I learn something new from my students every single day. I’m incredibly fortunate, and it’s all thanks to you.

[01:56]
Yes, I mean it. You wake up early everyday to help with the house and fields, and pour your heart into studying Mencius in every spare moment. On top of that, you take care of my daily needs and even prepare late-night meals for the students who stay after hours.

Your presence is the very foundation that supports both Shoka Sonjuku and me. Thank you, from the bottom of my heart.

Hehe, please don’t push yourself too hard. It’d be a real problem if you fell ill.

(Another day)

[02:43]
Good morning. Did you sleep well last night?

Hehe, don’t try to hide it. You were reviewing until late again, weren’t you? You look a bit dazed.

Here, let me help with breakfast. I’m not much of a cook, but I can at least set out the plates and trays.

Hm? Your hand feels hot. Are you feeling sick?

What…? Ah… you have a really high fever!

Fumi! Perfect timing—hurry and bring a doctor!

Why did you keep pushing yourself so hard without telling anyone? Hold on, I’ll carry you to your room.

(In the room)

[04:00]
Still asleep? …This towel is getting warm. Your fever seems to have gone down, but it’s still there. Let me change it.

There. That should make you feel a bit better.

You’re burning up from overwork… I can’t believe you pushed yourself to this point. And all this time, I’ve been depending on you so much without even realizing it.

When you collapsed, I was terrified you might never wake up… My heart froze at the thought. I’ve never felt anything like that before. I didn’t realize you were so small and so delicate…

Oh… oh, you’re just rolling over. Good. Please allow me to stay by your side a little longer… at least until this pounding in my chest subsides just a bit.

(A few days later)

[05:58]
You want to make up for the missed lessons from the past few days tonight? True, we only have a little left to cover, but shouldn’t you take a few more days to rest properly?

I can’t compete with your enthusiasm. Promise you’ll tell me immediately if you start feeling unwell. You shouldn’t overdo it just after recovering.

All right. Let’s begin the final lesson.

(Later)

“…If there is no one to carry forward the sage’s teachings now, there will be no one to do so in the future.” [1] This is where Mencius’s words end.

Congratulations. You’ve finished studying Mencius. You’ve worked very hard to reach this point.

It’s me who should be thanking you. Your unwavering dedication to learning has been a true inspiration.

Ah, the night air is so pleasant. Would you like to go outside for a bit?

Don’t worry, we won’t leave the Sugi estate.

[07:46]
It’s been ages since I came here. Do you remember? A few years ago, I found you crying alone in this place. Just like tonight, countless fireflies are dancing around. I can still picture your face, bathed in their gentle light.

After I was released from Noyama Prison, you said that you wanted to study Mencius of your own accord, that you wanted to see the world from the same perspective as I do. Hearing that made me very happy.

Day and night, you studied by my side, and you supported me and my students so selflessly. I’ve held you dear in my heart for so long. I once thought those feelings were the same ones I have for my family.

But recently, I’ve come to realize that what I feel for you isn’t the same as what I feel for my three younger sisters. When you collapsed the other day, and I saw how much you’ve been supporting me, I finally realized how precious you’re to me.

[09:33]
How frusting… Despite all the books I’ve read, they’ve only filled my head with such narrow knowledge that I can’t find the right words to express how precious you’re to me.

What is it? You… lied to me?

Another reason you wanted to study Mencius was that you wanted to get to know me and understand me better…

Haha, you’re really so honest. Then… can I assume that our hearts beat as one? (Kiss)

[10:54]
I love you. Thank you. (Kiss)

My role as your older brother ends today. You’re no longer my sister, you’re the only woman I love.

Your hands are so warm and gentle, just like they were back then. Let’s head back, holding hands.

We’re here already. Even though we’ll see each other again when morning comes… why is it so hard to say goodbye?

Go on inside. I’ll return to my room.

Good night, (kiss) and sweet dreams.

[1] (由孔子而來至於今，百有餘歲，去聖人之世，若此其未遠也；近聖人之居，若此其甚也，)然而無有乎爾，則亦無有乎爾。from Mencius, Chapter 14 Jin Xin II.
“(From Confucius downwards until now, there are only 100 years and somewhat more. The distance in time from the sage is so far from being remote, and so very near at hand was the sage’s residence. In these circumstances,) is there no one to transmit his doctrines? Yea, is there no one to do so?” translated by James Legge.

Grassroots Uprising

[00:05]
In June of Ansei 5 (1858), four years after opening its borders, this country had reached a turning point. However, this turning point was far from favorable.

(Shoka Sonjuku)

If what is written in this letter from Edo is true, how foolish the shogunate is. It says that Ii Naosuke, the newly appointed Tairo [1] of the shogunate, has forced through the signing of treaties to open trade with foreign powers without the Emperor’s endorsement. Such actions are unacceptable.

[00:50]
Excuse me, could you bring me paper and a pen?

Yes, I’m writing to Lord Mori, our feudal lord. I will send him a petition urging the Choshu clan to take the lead in rectifying the shogunate’s mistake with utmost sincerity.

This country, which has just opened its doors, is like a newborn child who does not yet know left from right. If large-scale trading begins, it is the common people who will suffer and bear the burn. If those entrusted with protecting the country and guiding its people fail to consider this… then the shogunate no longer has the right to govern this country.

(Offscreen)

[01:46]
Simply put, my petition, along with the appeals that followed, was blocked by the conservatives within the Choshu clan and never reached its intended audience. My words were deemed threatening, and I was once again imprisoned in Noyama Prison in December of the same year.

It was then, when I realized that it was pointless to expect anything from my clan, that I reached a conclusion in prison—Grassroots Uprising (Somo Koki). Only nameless patriots, swaying like the grass and trees of the fields, could change this country. [2]

(Noyama Prison)

[02:57]
It’s been a while. You seem to have lost weight. Are you eating properly?

Hehe, don’t lie to me. If you keep standing outside Noyama Prison in this cold weather with a body like that, you’ll collapse again like last time.

Yes, Fukukawa-dono [3], the prison warden, told me how you’ve come every day this snowy January, asking to see me. Even when turned away, you never left, always waiting until nightfall.

[03:53]
Your cheeks are cold. It’s snowing again today, isn’t it? Being able to barely touch you through these bars is unbearably frustrating… and painful. I never knew that loving someone could be so agonizing. Even though you’re so close, I’m unable to hold you and warm you… Please… forgive me for being so powerless.

Fukukawa-dono is calling. You must go now. In Edo, Tairo Ii Naosuke is arresting and punishing those who defy the shogunate. Having openly opposed the shogunate so many times, they’ll surely come for me next.

[05:04]
I acted of my own volition, so I will neither flee nor hide. However, seeing me now will only put you in danger. I know I’m being selfish, but that’s the one thing I cannot bear.

So please… don’t come here anymore. Promise me?

Thank you. Bring your face a little closer. (Kiss)

Now, go. Don’t look back.

[1] 大老 (Tairo): High-ranking official roughly comparable to the prime minister.
[2] 草莽崛起 (Somo Koki) is Yoshida Shoin’s famous theory. In Mencius, 草莽 originally referred to hermits hidden among grass and trees but later came to symbolize the general populace.
[3] 福川犀之助 (Fukukawa Sainosuke): the warden of the Noyama Prison. It’s said that he respected Yoshida Shoin’s words and deeds, and granted him a lot of freedom in prison, including reading, teaching, and receiving visits from family and friends.

Drops of Moonlight

[00:02]
In April of Ansei 6 (1859), the shogunate issued an official order to the Choshu clan to hand me over. The night before I was to be transferred to Edo, on May 24th, thanks to Fukukawa-dono’s arrangement, I was allowed to return to the Sugi family for one night.

(Sugi household)

[00:35]
The students are gone now. It’s just you and me here now. Welcome home. I want to hold you tightly to make up for the time we lost while I was in Noyama Prison.

I’m home.

How strange… Though I’ve been away from this house for long so many times before, today even the scent of the tatami mats and the worn scratches on the pillars feel incredibly nostalgic.

What began as a small the Mencius lecture with you and a few others has turned into this Shoka Sonjuku, before I even realized it. Those countless days of teaching and learning with my students now seem like a distant, faraway dream.

[02:06]
Are you crying? That’s not what I wanted. I never wanted to see that look on your face.

Look at me. Look into my eyes.

The tears illuminated by the moonlight are beautiful, but we only have such a short time left to be together. Can you smile for me?

This is troubling… How can I stop your tears? (Kiss)

Please, stop crying. If you don’t, I… I won’t be able to contain these feelings… (Tremble)

[03:24]
For this moment… just this moment, let me be nothing more than a man in love with you. (Kiss)

I love you. I love you so much.

I’m sorry if I was rough with you. Did I hurt your back?

I’m glad. Meeting you taught me what it means to love. And yet, it frightens me to even touch you like this. I feel as though my desire to hold you might break you. I don’t want to hurt you, my precious one. But even so, I don’t know how to quell this ever-quickening heartbeat. It’s truly troubling.

[04:52]
Come closer. Let me feel you even closer than anyone else.

Don’t be shy… You’re beautiful.

Wrap your arms around me and untie my obi. Don’t hesitate—please, with your hands…

Thank you.

This is my first time hearing such an alluring voice from you. Your cheeks and ears are flushed red, and you look as if you might cry.

[06:14]
I’ve always lived my life detached from romance, but being with you makes me realize my desires as a man. I thought I’d be afraid, but the more I touch you, the more I long for you.

You’re so warm. Feeling our bodies so close, it’s almost too hot. If only we could just melt into one.

Please remember this—in all my life, you are and will always be the only one I love.

[07:13]
When dawn comes to part us, please don’t forget the days we spent together, every word we shared, the warmth of our embrace… Please, please don’t forget.

Don’t cry. If your tears don’t stop, I’ll wipe them away like this, one by one.

Look, I’m right here. Touch me with your hands, feel me, and hold me tight.

Yes, just like that. Don’t let go. Let me engrave every bit of you into my heart so I can remember you forever.

Thank you… for loving me.

I love you.

Everlasting Spirit

[00:06]
The eastern sky is starting to lighten. Dawn will soon be upon us.

Oh, what’s wrong? Why are you clinging to me so tightly all of a sudden?

Heh, yes, if we leave here before sunrise, I could whisk you away somewhere far. After all, once I’m sent to Edo, I may never set foot in Hagi again.

But, as I said before, I won’t run away or hide. I must go, because it’s time to reap what I’ve sown.

[01:19]
A person’s life is much like the seasons. The rice seeds sown in spring grow into vibrant green seedlings in summer, bear golden ears in autumn, and are harvested and stored before winter comes, marking the end of life’s cycle. Be it short or long, every life is born into this world to fulfill its purpose, and within all of us, the seasons exist. [1]

I don’t yet know if what I’ve accomplished will become golden rice ears or just empty husks. That’s for those who come after me to decide.

And if someone takes up my cause, then I’ll have left behind one fruitful harvest in this world.

[02:36]
This isn’t a journey to my death—it’s a journey to gather the harvest with my own hands.

As long as someone carries on my aspirations, even if my body perishes, I will continue to live on. So, please, don’t cry anymore. My soul will surely live on within you, too.

Until the morning comes, let me hold you close. So, just rest for a little while. Find peace in your heart.

(Morning)

[03:51]
You don’t need to see me off any further.

Ah, what a beautiful morning—perfect for a journey.

Well then, I’m off now. (Kiss)

I love you.

Keep moving forward and stay strong. Until the day you complete your own seasons… my heart will always be with you.

I will always, always… be by your side.

[1] This is from Yoshida Shoin’s final work, Record of a Recluse. The original title, 留魂錄, inspired the name of this track, 留魂.

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